Me and my attachment problem(s) – Part 2b

D and L are two kids who could really make me cry!

During my 3 months attachment with the hostel, I always greeted D and L this way:-

“Good morning, D/L! Can you gimme a hug?”

“NO!!!” D always declined whereas for L, without hesitation, she would just hug me tight.

L is more expressive in terms of her feelings and she always does heartwarming stuff!

She would ask G, “Papa, can you say I love you?”

“Sure! But why suddenly?” G asked.

“So that I can say I love you too and then I can kiss you!”

Isn’t that sweet?

G and A always asked the kids to be messengers to inform N and I that we were invited to their house for dinners. One day, L biked to the office and asked, “Sam, would you like to have dinner with me?” I thought it was just another dinner that I was invited over. So I told L that I was gonna go over once I was done with what’s on hand.

But when I finally got up to their house, I had the most embarrassing moment in my life (I couldn’t recall any incident which could top this at this point!): G and A were having guests in the house and they were taken aback at my sudden visit. “Err… L went over to office and invited me for dinner, so I thought….” A blush of embarrassment crept up my face. My presence embarrassed everyone and to make thing worse, they couldn’t really spare extra food for me. So I wasn’t invited by G and A but it’s L’s own idea that she wanted to have dinner with me!

I was so embarrassed no doubt but I found solace in the thought that I must be someone really nice that L would like to have dinner with me so much!

D and L always found the chores I was doing interesting and always tried to help. When I was weeding, D came up to me, “Sam, you must be thirsty! Do you want something to drink? Juice or water?” I thought G was the one who’s rewarding me for taking up the arduous task voluntarily without him ordering me to do so. Later, A told me, it’s D’s own idea and he just went to A and said, “Mama, can you make some juice for Sam?”

Helping me with weeding

Helping me with weeding

Helping me with cleaning

Helping me with cleaning

Trying to help(not really) while I was painting the All Blacks table. Outcome: paint stain on face!

Trying to help (not really) while I was painting the All Blacks table. Outcome: paint stain on face!

A week before I left the hostel, G drove me to Whakatane to join the one day trip to White Island, bringing along N and the kids to have a road trip together.

Me, with L and D

Me, with L and D

After i boarded the boat, L being at the wharf, shouted, “Sam, are you coming back?” Just to see how she would react, I shook my head. She turned to my boss anxiously and after that she shouted again, “Sam, come back!!! Come back!!!” Witnessing the scene together with me, fellow tourists on board told me, “She misses you!” I smiled a contented smile and waved back at L.

"Is Sam coming back?"

“Is Sam coming back?”

When I left the hostel in early December, I did not get to bid them farewell. When I went back to the hostel on end of February before leaving NZ, G asked me to come up to his house early morning to find out if they could still remember me.

D woke up first, while he’s still rubbing his sleepy eyes, G asked, “See who’s here?”

“SAM!!!” He’s shouted with excitement and ran towards me, and guess what, he gave me a HUG!!! Seeing this scene, I was already in tears.

Then L also woke up and greeted me full of happiness! D ran to the shower room and shouted to A who’s in there, “Mama, guess who’s here? Sam is here!!!” I was in more tears seeing this.

L was showing me a doll having the same name as hers.

L was showing me a doll having the same name as hers.

It was quite an effort for me to calm myself down after all the touching scenes, then it was G’s turn to turn me into a crying baby! He dropped me off to the bus station. En route, I told him, “G, I feel really sad to have to leave….” G replied nonchalantly, “Don’t be silly! Every goodbye makes the next hello closer!”

I cried harder when the following conversation took place:-

G: You will be missed as a friend. You have such a good nature. No one would say that you are not nice.

Me: Oh! My ex-es think I am awful!

G: They are ex-es, for a reason!

Part 1 | Part 2a


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